How we actually met.

we met in the early of April 2014. it was a hot night during spring. i was there playing with my cousins and sister in the largest and 

most famous park in Jogjakarta, Indonesia. i was there playing around with them with a light inside my heart. i never thought i could 

experienced a sweet day like that. 3 hour before that, i went to  zoo to accompanied my little cousins to see the animals. it was 

pretty boring until i got a text from my best friend, Ray. he text me and asked me where i was. i told him i was in the zoo and i 

needed to escape. he told me to meet him in the park at night and he asked me if it was okay if he brings a friend with him. then i told 

him it was okay.

 as the time went by, i text him where he was and he didn't answer me. i waited and i played with my cousins and 

sister. it was a really fine night with a warm weather touching my skin perfectly. i wore a black flowered crop top and a knee length 

flare skirt. i also brought my medium size brown bag that i bought the day before. in that park there were two big trees standing 

facing each other and there was a gap between them. 

old story says if you could walk through that gap, you can wish on anything 

and it will become true. my cousin used a red scarf to blindfolded me so that i could begin that journey. my cousin turn me around 

and around so that i had to find the right direction to walk through the trees. i walked 3 three times and i ended up standing far 

away from the trees. last one, i tried and i walked bravely. then i reached the other side of the tree. i was too happy then i jumped 

around. i heard a laugh then i turned myself around and i was my best friend, Ray. he was there looking at me and laughed. i ran into 

him and hugged him tightly. he introduced me to a guy named Teddy. he said his name was Teddy and i said my name was Mel. it was 

the day i met him. 

*

it was only the beginning. the beginning of a very complicated love. it's just the beginning. it is an interesting story to read and you 

will want to know what happened between them after they met. you will be curious enough to ask me the next step of this story. 

you will be.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lp-EO5I60KA

My Prayers

i closed my eyes and laid down my knees

i put my hands together and kept myself in silent

took a deep breath and done it one more time

i began to cry and this is what i said

"God, i love you

thank you for your blessing

thank you for the life you gave me

oh, God, i wanna tell you something

i know that you already knew about him

i just can't stand to have no feelings for him

i see you in him, God

i still don't understand why you put us together now

we're still young

we're silly

but then i just realize that you are the one who sent him for me

is he the answer to all my prayers?

or he is just another man that walks into my life and will teach me a lesson

oh God, no, i am not complaining, but i'm curious

i want to know God

please, let me know."

Miss Understanding

i opened my eyes and i couldn't find you anywhere
oh well, it was only a dream that i met you

i left my room and took a shower
i tried to eat my breakfast but i missed you
and all of our conversations

i met you at the very bad timing
it was all my fault
to let you in to my life

it was a sunny day when i hear your voice over the phone
you took me by surprise
i never thought that you would be that nice
i never thought

you weren't there when i waited for you
you weren't there when i needed you
i got mad at you
i got upset at you

i got myself attached to movies
tried to let go of thoughts about you
and when i watched those movies
it reminded me of you

right now, i am still wishing that you are here
making a day off to meet me
just to see me
but i guess.. you just do not care at all.

Puisi Hatiku - Poetry of My Heart

aku ingin mengungkapkan perasaan dalam hatiku
menuliskan perasaan yang tidak bisa ku katakan dengan bibirku
menorehkan macam-macam perasaan ada di dalam jiwaku
menuliskan isi hatiku

kejujuran bukanlah hal yang mudah untuk diungkapkan
namun pikiran dan hatiku lelah
lelah akan hal yang membuat otak dan hatiku terus bertengkar
mengungkapkan kenyataan yang pernah terjadi dalam hidupku

menatap wajahmu untuk pertama kalinya
mendengar suaramu untuk pertama kalinya
lalu aku membayangkan saat ini
tidak mengetahui bahwa kau menjadi orang yang penting bagiku

membiarkan semua alunan cerita berlangsung
pertemuan di malam itu memang bukan hal yang biasa
pertemuan yang membuatku yakin akan sesuatu yang kuragukan
membuatku yakin akan arti...

tidak, belum waktunya aku mengatakan ini
belum saatnya, belum waktunya

tahukah kau?
detak jantungku selalu berdetak lebih cepat saat kau menghubungiku
perasaan kesal, marah, emosi, bahagia, tersenyum, semua bercampur aduk
perasaan seperti ini sudah lama tidak aku rasakan.

aku hanya ingin mengutarakan perasaanku
perasaan bahagia yang aku rasakan saat kau menghubungiku
kau memang berbeda
aku harap kau adalah jawaban dari doaku selama ini

ya, semoga saja.

Jauh - Far

Mungkin saat ini kau berada jauh dariku
sebentar lagi aku kesana
sebentar lagi aku sampai
tidak akan ada jarak lagi yang memisahkan kita
tidak akan ada lagi halangan diantara kita

Sebentar lagi aku sampai dan akan menemuimu
bertemu denganmu
menatap matamu
menyentuh tanganmu
merasakan hangatnya pelukanmu

Jarak ribuan mil yang membuat kita tidak dapat bertemu
jarak ribuan mil yang membuat kita terpisah amat jauh
namun sebentar lagi
sebentar lagi semuanya akan berakhir

Aku harap perjalananmu menyenangkan
aku harap perjalananmu tidak memobsankan
aku harap kau tersenyum selama kau dalam perjalanan
karena akupun tersenyum memikirkanmu setiap saat

Tanpa ada rasa kecewa
dipenuhi rasa rindu
semoga kau baik-baik saja.

Arti Kehadiranmu

Tidak, kamu tidak mengingatkanku padanya
kamu tidak membuatku ingin pergi

Kamu berbeda dengan yang lain
kamu memiliki cara sendiri untuk membuatku tersenyum

Kamu memiliki senyum yang mampu menyemangatiku
kamu punya bakat untuk memeluk hangat hatiku

Bukan dengan cincin atau bunga
bukan dengan coklat atau perhiasan

Hanya dengan senyuman dan kasih sayang
hanya dengan pelukan dan rasa cinta

Kau buatku tersadar
kau buatku membuka mata

Tentang apa arti cinta
itulah arti kehadiranmu

Mine, Yours, Ours.

I have never thought  that you'd be the one
who give me the scars i never wish

Imagining you there with those people
i don't know what else to do

wait? do you think i can wait?
Am i strong enough in your eyes?

i don't even know if i am strong
i don't even know if i can hold on

Time flies
weather changes

people dies
Blue sky collapse

I keep my heart on ur track
but you are the one who runaway

I thought you'd stay with me
stay and write this story with me

Every second i've spent with you
Was a miracle that ever happened to me

Wanting you here is my pray
having you by my side is my wish

I wish you a really good day
I wish you never be sad

I wish you a happy life
forever.

Our little talks - poem

I never get a chance to tell u how i feel
telling u my feelings
all of the smiles i've shown
With u as the reason
And each time looking at ur eyes
making me smile
all at once
singing in the corner of my room
All about u
alll about us and our memories
thinking for hours before sleep
imagining u and all little talks
all laughs we have shared
i feel good when im with u
i feel comfortable and warm
i feel happy
but then the reality slaps me in the face
seeing u joking with her
making me smiling in sadness
making me laughing in tears
i did not cry outside
I did not let my tears falls
but everytime she smiles at ur jokes
u give me a scratch in my heart